I'm Sorry
by Dancho
Summary: While on patrol with Ron, Percy is killed and Ron can't stop blaming himself. Other stuff happens. Rated for Language and content.
1. Past and Present

(AN: This takes place when Ron is in his seventh year. Any questions?)  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. I only own this plot.  
  
Chapter 1  
  
!!!.!!! - Ron's POV [.] - Ron's thoughts  
  
@@@.@@@ - Percy's POV {.} - Percy's thoughts  
  
!!!I pulled my robe on over my head and glanced at myself in the mirror. Harry would have had a friendly word to say but since he was in North Africa with Sirius Black-whoes name had only recently been cleared-and Professor Lupin I was alone. Hagrid was still in the mountains recruiting the giants and any other animals that would listen. I really missed him. I missed everyone.  
  
Fred and George were always busy, either with their joke shop or as auror's. Bill and Charlie were still away, though the ministry had recruited Bill to become a spell caster. His years at the bank had taught him many useful spells and he had become quite an asset to the ministry.  
  
Charlie still worked with Dragons, but it was a lot more secure these days. The ministry had gotten wind, through one of the spies, that Voldemort was planing to use dragons to attack the light magic. Charlie was so busy he barley even wrote to mum. Not to worry, though; she wrote to him.  
  
Dad had been busy latly because he'd gotten 'promoted'. Obviously the ministry felt that keeping the muggle world from finding out about us wizards was the least of their problems and everyone in dad's department had gotten moved to leading raids or other dark arts prevention stuff. Mum was always fretting about him and I swear she glanced at our house clock every four seconds. Hogwarts was also under heightened security, even more than when we thought Sirius Black was a murder.  
  
I let out a sigh and made my way down the steps. I was a few minutes early, but when you're on patrol with Percy a few seconds could mean the difference between being yelled out and a friendly smile. I honestly wasn't in the mood for a tongue-lashing from Percy, so I'd decided to show up a bit early. Percy, as usual, was already there and waiting. I rubbed the back of my neck and sat down next to him, glancing at the book he was reading.  
  
[Muggle magic?] I mused. [Why does he care? Percy is usually so busy in the magicing world that he never even worries about muggles. Actually, that book sounds like something dad would read.]  
  
"Hello, Percy." I said after a minute. Percy nearly jumped out of his skin.  
  
"Ron!" He exclaimed, trying to hide his book in the folds of his robe. "I.I didn't see you there!"  
  
"That's alright." I sighed. "I'm a bit early. You want to go on duty early tonight? Neville and Ginny, now that they're dating, aren't the most reliable lookouts. I really can't understand why no one can ever manage to get them on separate patrols."  
  
"Because Ginny flirts with the wizard who organizes them, I should suppose." Percy sighed, stretching.  
  
"So let a girl organize them!" I groaned.  
  
"I've heard that Neville can be quite winning when he chooses to be." Percy shrugged. "But you're right. We should relieve them now."  
  
Percy stood and slipped his book on to a table next to the couch. We went to the portrait and pushed it open, hopping to the ground below. It wasn't a far drop but it always seemed longer when you jumped down. We wandered the halls, checking every broom closet and windowsills 'til we found them on the astronomy tower.  
  
"Dear God!" I groaned using on of the many muggle expressions I had picked up from my trips around London with Hermione. She insisted that I should learn muggle ways so that I wouldn't stick out like a soar thumb, another muggle expression, when I was in a crowd of them. I continually told her that I never planned on going to a muggle area, so I didn't need to bother. She didn't listen.  
  
"Why can't you two ever get a room?" I asked, shielding my eyes and using yet another muggle expression. I had to admit that I was using them a lot more. They just seemed to come in handy.  
  
"Sorry." Ginny blushed.  
  
"It's alright." Percy sighed, smiling at Ginny. I groaned. He always had had a soft spot in his heart for her, being the baby, but I never understood why he could care less-another muggle expression-about me! "Ron and I will take over for the rest of your shift. Just, please, do that somewhere out of sight!"  
  
We waited for them to leave before we started wandering the halls. I sighed and looked around at the pictures. A few waved, but most were asleep because of the late hour.  
  
"So." Percy said after a minute. "We haven't had a chance to talk lately. How's Hermione?"  
  
"She's fine." I told him. "She's decided that after our graduation, she's going to a wizard's college."  
  
"Oh really?" Percy nodded. "What in?"  
  
"Well, she plans to get a major in defending against dark arts and a minor in medicine. She plans to be an auror."  
  
"I see. She'll make a great one." Percy sighed. "What about you, though? What do you plan to do?"  
  
"Me? Oh, I don't know really. Get a job in the ministry perhaps. But I might go to school with Hermione and become an auror as well."  
  
"Any other plans?" Percy asked, raising his eyebrows.  
  
[What is he on about?] I wondered. [OH! The same thing as mum. I mean, sure, I plan on marring Hermione, but it's really to early! It's not like I'm sleeping with her. Though that has come up a few times. Not that I'd mind but.]  
  
"You're just as bad as mum." I told him after a few minutes of silence.  
  
"I know how you fell. She's really been on to me now that Penelope and I have split up. She's also been on to Bill and Charlie about getting married. I think she just wants a grandchild to spoil."  
  
"We don't have to get married to have kids." I mumbled. Percy glared at me.  
  
"You know full well, that if you got Hermione pregnant, Mum would be forcing you to marry her!"  
  
"Jeez! Don't make me sound so irresponsible. I'd marry her if she got pregnant. We're not having sex though, so no worries, eh?" I shrugged. Percy sighed. "Can't we talk about something else?"  
  
"What else is there to talk about? If it isn't classified, it's depressing! And now with the whole Malfoy thing.oops."  
  
"What happened?" I asked.  
  
"You've got to promise not to mention this to anyone else."  
  
"I promise." I sighed.  
  
"Last night, Dad lead a raid on the Malfoy home. Draco tried to give himself up and Lucius killed him."  
  
"Draco is dead?" I asked.  
  
"Yes. Lucius killed himself and his wife so that they wouldn't be taken."  
  
"Oh." I gasped. [Draco dead?! I never.never thought.]  
  
"See what I mean? Voldemort's rising to power. We've go spies everywhere! Even our own spies are being found out! Ever wonder why you got a new potions teacher?"  
  
"They found out about Snape?" I asked.  
  
"Yea. He's in hiding. Can't tell where though. I don't think anyone but Snape know that."  
  
"Dark." I sighed. Suddenly a crash sounded down the hall. Percy and I both jumped.  
  
"Stay here." Percy told me. "I'm going to go check and make sure it's okay. Stay here and make sure that it's not just a decoy."  
  
"Alright." I nodded and Percy ran off. !!!  
  
@@@I ran down the halls and glanced back once to make sure Ron wasn't following me. I knew he wouldn't, but I had to be sure. I smiled at the lie I had made up. Sure, it was plausible that this was just a decoy, but death eaters were rarely that subtle. They preferred to smash their way in and blast away with hexes at anything that moved.  
  
{Not pretty, but it works!} I shrugged. {Now, where did that sound come from?}  
  
I paused a minute to think and heard and smack coming from one of the rooms on my right. I crept towards the door and listened closely.  
  
"You idiot!" I heard someone mutter. "Why didn't you just send up purple and green sparks to let the world know were here?"  
  
"I'm sorry!" Another voice mumbled.  
  
"You should be!" yet another chimed in. {Three death eaters?!}  
  
I tried to creep away when the opened and slammed into my face. I fell on my back and was suddenly looking at three huge death eaters. I tried to grab my wand but the shortest-who couldn't have been more than a few inches taller than me-kicked it away. I tried to sit up but the other two pointed their wands at me.  
  
"Well, well, well! If it isn't Percy Weasley."  
  
I tired to move my mouth, but nothing would come out. The death water that had kicked my wand seemed to find this very amusing. I glared at him and kicked at his ankles, causing him to topple over.  
  
"Why you!" the death eater cried as he pointed his wand at me. I winced and waited for my sentence.  
  
"Crucio!" He cried. I tried to call out but the bolt of energy was already headed at me. I felt it hit and felt the pain surge through me. I wanted to scream but it hurt too much. I hurt everywhere. My hands, my feet, my mouth, even my lungs hurt. I wanted to die. Then it stopped.  
  
"That's enough." The tallest death eater declared hitting the other death eater's wand away. I gasped for air and tried to pull my self up. My hands still stung and I ended up just lying on my back, trying to fight that pain. "But you have given me an idea. Imperio!"  
  
I felt a little lightheaded at first but the pain was gone from my body and for that I was grateful.  
  
"Stand up." A voice whispered to me. "Stand up.stand up."  
  
{Why?} I asked myself, but my legs were already moving. Before I know what was happening, I was on my feet and facing the death eaters. The shortest one handed my wand back.  
  
"Find the others." The voice sighed. I turned and began to walk down the hall. "When you find them.kill them all. We'll be back in a few minutes."  
  
I tried to stop.  
  
{I have to fight this!} I screamed, but my feet kept moving. I fought until my body was to tired and I gave up. I kept walking 'til around the corner came Ron.@@@ 


	2. Choices and Pain

(AN: NO!! I can't believe I just wrote that! How could I? I hate myself now! Poor Percy.Poor Ron!)  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own a thing.  
  
Chapter 2  
  
###.### - Hermione's POV '.' - Hermione's thoughts  
  
!!!I looked up just in time to see Percy. I let out a sigh of relief.  
  
"Percy!" I grinned. "I'd thought the death eaters had gotten you!"  
  
He didn't smile back. I frowned wondering what was wrong with him.  
  
[Why isn't he talking? Or moving?] I thought.  
  
"Percy?" I asked, moving to put my hand on his shoulder. He raised his wand and pointed it at me. "Whoa!"  
  
"Ron." He croaked. I could see a look of pain cross his face and I took a step back. He let out a strangled choke and dropped his wand. "Ron! Run! Run and warn the others. They tortured me and they planed to make me kill you all. They're coming back!"  
  
"Percy." I started, pulling my wand out. He grabbed his wand again and pointed it at me.  
  
"Run." He told me. I looked at his wand and the look in his eyes, and knew not to argue. I heard a crash at the end of the hall and Percy turned to face it. He looked over his shoulder and bit his lip. "New plan! Hide. And Ron? I'm sorry."  
  
I started to back away, unsure of what was happening.  
  
"GO!" Percy roared at me, as he pushed me away. I turned and took off down the hall, trying to block out the crashes and shouts that I was running from. I turned the corner and jumped into a closet, and tried to catch my breath. There was silence and then I heard Percy.  
  
"Owwww." He moaned. "That hurts."  
  
I tried to move, but I was to scared. My legs wouldn't move. I was about to open the closet door when I heard Percy scream and another voice.  
  
"Adava Kedavra!" The new voice screamed and was followed by a flash of green. I froze.  
  
[Percy!] I wanted to scream. I wanted to bang on the door; run to Percy; do something! I tried to open my mouth, but my body would not respond. I tried to move, but I couldn't.  
  
"Damn!" the voice sighed. "My Lord will not be pleased, but we must call off the attack. The others must already know of our intent."  
  
I waited and waited for the person to come looking for me, but he did not. I leaned against the wall and let my legs give way. I slid down the wall 'til I was sitting on my butt. I crossed my arms to try and fight to chill, but nothing helped. I shivered and pulled my knees to my chest. I put my head down and felt a tear run down my check. It was soon followed by another and another. I cried quietly, not wanting to be found, until I felt I could never cry again. I was empty, but it still hurt. My heart ached and I wanted to die. Die and sleep forever.  
  
"Percy." I whispered. "Percy." !!!  
  
###I glanced at the clock on the wall and sighed. It was almost an hour since Ron and Percy were due back. Fred and George had gone out when it had been their shift but said they hadn't been able to find them, so they had decided to take their shift and watch out for Ron and Percy at the same time. I was getting worried. I knew that Ron hated his patrol and Percy, though apt to work harder than needed, was not likely to work this hard. I sighed and stepped out of the common room. If anyone found out that I had gone looking for them alone, they might take away house points, but I honestly didn't care that much right now. Harry and Ron had taught me that sometimes some things are more important than house points and following the rules. Things like friendship, love and doing the right thing. I hurried down the halls and suddenly rammed into one of the twins.  
  
"Steady there!" the twin cried, almost falling over. When he looked down and realized it was I, his face grew worried. "Say, Hermione, what are you doing here?"  
  
"I was.I was looking for Ron." I sputtered.  
  
"Then look no further." The other twin sighed, his face equally dark. "We've found him."  
  
"Oh?" I asked, a feeling of apprehension and worry washing over me.  
  
"He's alive." The first twin reassured me. I looked at their faces.  
  
'This can't be good.' I worried. 'The twins are never this serious unless something is very wrong.'  
  
"What is it?" I asked. I bit my lip as soon as I had said those words. I really didn't want to know.  
  
"We found him hiding in a closet. He wouldn't speak to us or move. We don't even think he realized we were there. He just kept saying one word over and over again." The second twin said, after shooting a look at the other one.  
  
"What.what did he say?" I pressed.  
  
'Why can't I just shut up?' I almost cried. 'I don't want to know! I just want to see Ron!'  
  
"He just kept saying.'Percy'." The second twin whispered.  
  
"Did you find Percy?" I asked.  
  
"No. Percy is still missing." The first twin admitted.  
  
"Can I see him?" I asked. The twins looked at each other.  
  
"No. George and I won't allow it." Fred, the second twin, sighed.  
  
"Tell Dumbledore and Madam Pomfrey what we told you. We're going to need some help." George told me. "Fred will wait here."  
  
George turned around and went back, presumable, to Ron. I turned to go to when Fred caught my sleeve.  
  
"Hermione. I want you to promise me that you will only go to find Dumbledore and Madam Pomfrey. Promise me that you won't try and see Ron until you've brought them here. It's not pretty."  
  
"I wouldn't have done anything else." I sighed. "Ron clearly needs help. I'm going to get it for him."  
  
"Thank you." Fred sighed as he let go of my robes. I nodded and ran off to get some help. ###  
  
Hermione waited outside the infirmary, hoping for and dreading the time when Madam Pomfrey would come out and tell her how Ron was.  
  
'This is silly!' She told herself. 'Ron has been through worse, much worse! He'll be fine. If only he would talk to us. Damn it! I hate this! I can't help! I can't even do research until I know what's wrong.'  
  
She suddenly looked up as Dumbledore came out of Ron's room. She stood and opened her mouth to bombard him with questions when he held up a hand to silence her.  
  
"He's fine. Madam Pomfrey has given him a sleeping potion so if you wish to speak to him, you'd best hurry. It's his nerves. Somethinghappened tonight, but Ron is in no state to tell us what. Now, hurry up if you want to talk."  
  
She nodded and hurried into Ron's room. He was laying on his back, staring at the ceiling with big, unseeing eyes. She coughed, quietly, hoping to attract his attention. She didn't. She walked closer and sat down next to him.  
  
"Ron?" She asked.  
  
"Percy." He whispered. "Percy, I'm sorry."  
  
"Ron, can you hear me?" She asked again, a bit louder this time. He didn't answer. standing a little, she leaned over and touched his shoulder but he didn't respond. "Ron!"  
  
"I'm so very sorry, Percy." Ron repeated, closing his eyes as the potion took effect.  
  
"Ron!" Hermione sobbed, quietly. "What happened to you?" 


	3. Nightmares and Owls

(AN: Oh! I'm loving this! Sorry the other chapters were odd. But don't worry, they only get stranger!)  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing. I'm 14 for crying out loud!  
  
Chapter 3  
  
-.- Percy in Ron's head  
  
!!!I lifted my head and looked around me. Why was I still in the closet? I tried to stand but found that I was to tired. My eyes were closing and all I wanted to do was sleep. I was trying to fight my drowsiness when I heard foot steps. This snapped my awake faster than losing a chess game. The footsteps were slow and deliberate. I pushed myself away from the door and tried to cower in the very back. I let out a small whimper when suddenly the door was flung open. It was the sorting hat.  
  
"Cowering Weasley?" It asked me. "Not very brave!"  
  
"Please." I sniffed.  
  
"Too bad for you. I'm going to have to throw you out of Gryffindor. Now where should I put you?" The hat asked itself. I glanced around, surprised that I was suddenly in the great hall. I was surrounded by people in my class, but.we were all first years! I was drawn forward and the hat was put on my head. "Well, Weasley, your not very brave. Defiantly not wise or hard working. Not ambitious either. I simple can't put you in any of the houses. I'm going to have to.Throw him out!"  
  
"What?" I asked. "NO!"  
  
McGonagal and Hagrid picked me up and lead me down the rows, all the children laughing at me.  
  
"NO! Please!" I screamed.  
  
"Come back when you're braver!" McGonagal told me as Hagrid dropped me outside the school. I tried to stand up but I couldn't. I looked over at a figure coming towards me through the fog.  
  
"Please." I begged. "Help me."  
  
"Why?" The person asked. I looked up and saw Percy staring down at me. "You didn't help me."  
  
"No, please, Percy! I was scared! You told me to run!"  
  
"Run? Like a coward?" He asked me as he faded away. I screamed his name, hoping he would come back.  
  
"Ron?" A voice asked. "Ron?"  
  
I tried to turn around, but ended up on my back, staring straight into the face of Hermione.  
  
"Ron? Come on Ron! Talk to me!" She begged. I tried to speak but I kept hearing Percy in the back of my mind.  
  
"Coward!" Percy yelled at me. "Go on Coward, run away!"  
  
"STOP!" I screamed, squeezing my eyes closed and grabbing my ears. I sat bolt upright and screamed at Percy to shut up.  
  
"Ron!" Hermione yelled back at me. I felt a hand on my shoulder and pulled back, twisting so I could face them. It was Hermione. I took a deep breath and looked around. I was laying on a white bed in the hospital wing. It was quiet; too quiet. I let out a long sigh and fell back onto my bed, trying to shake Percy out of my head. I kept hearing him.  
  
-You left me.- Percy sneered. -You left me to die!-  
  
"Ron, you had a bad dream." Hermione told me, trying to hug me.  
  
-You brought it upon yourself.- Percy said. I could feel him shrug.  
  
"I did not!" I yelled at Percy.  
  
"Ron, I heard you talking in you sleep!" Hermione argued.  
  
-You were.- Percy laughed. -Screaming like a little baby!-  
  
"'Please, it was an accident! Leave me alone!" I sobbed, shaking my head, hoping to get Percy out.  
  
-Well, alright.- Percy sighed, retreating to the back of my mind. -But I will be back.-  
  
"If your sure." Hermione said, standing slowly.  
  
"No!" I told her, grabbing her hand. "I want you to stay."  
  
"Than why did you tell me to leave you alone?"  
  
"I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to him." I said, sitting up. Hermione gave me an odd look.  
  
"You must still be ill." Hermione said after a minute. She pulled her hand away and stood, pulling her robes tighter. "I'm going to go and tell the others you're up. Then I'm going to owl Harry. He'll want to come and see you."  
  
"No!" I screamed, lunging forward, jumping out of my bed. I stood and then grabbed her arms, using my height to tower over her. "You can't tell Harry."  
  
"Ron!" Hermione screamed. "Stop that! You're.You're hurting me!"  
  
"Don't owl Harry!" I insisted. "You can't!"  
  
"Ron, let go!" Hermione screamed. The opened and Fred and George ran in.  
  
"Ron?" Fred asked, reaching for his wand.  
  
"What are you doing?" George asked, stepping forward. I let go of Hermione and took a step back.  
  
"Please, you can't tell Harry!" I begged, as Hermione scrambled towards to door. "He can't know what I did!" 


	4. Voices and Madness

(AN: This is where Ron REALLY goes crazy. (BTW: Percy is at Hogwarts to help protect the other students. Fred and George are there for that same reason. Ginny and Neville are acting as guards because they volunteered. Also because I said so!) Feel free to ask any other questions and I'll e- mail you the answers, or add them to my next chapter post. Oh, and if you do ask a question, make sure I know your e-mail?)  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing. If you think I do, please step away from your computer and consult a physician.  
  
Chapter 4  
  
!!!"What are you talking about?" Fred asked, pointing his wand at me.  
  
"I killed him." I sobbed.  
  
-Damn straight! - Percy snarled inside me head. I pressed my hands to my ears and tried to shake him out. -I'm not going so easily this time! OH, don't act so surprised! I said I'd be back! -  
  
"Stop it!" I begged Percy. "Leave me alone! It was an accident!"  
  
"Ron?" George asked, coming closer and touching my shoulder.  
  
"Tell him it was an accident!" I screamed at George as I tried to get rid of Percy's voice. "Tell him to leave me alone! It was an accident, an accident!"  
  
"Tell who?" Fred asked, utterly bewildered.  
  
"Percy!" I screamed, as I threw my head back. My eyes were scrunched closed but I could still see Percy's face. He smiled at me and reached for my throat. I grabbed my hair and pulled on it, trying to fight Percy. "Tell him to go away."  
  
"Ron, there isn't anyone else in the room!" George cried, shaking me.  
  
"He's here!" I told him. "He's here and he won't leave me alone!"  
  
"Come on, Ron." Fred said, coming closer to him. "Just get back in the bed."  
  
"I can't!" I screamed at him. "He'll get me!"  
  
"Ron, I don't want to make you!" Fred sighed. "Don't force me to do anything I'll regret."  
  
"SHUT UP!" I screamed at both Fred and Percy.  
  
"Petrificus Totalus." A voice yelled and I suddenly went very stiff. I felt my body fall over and tried to stop myself when George caught me.  
  
"You shouldn't have done that Fred." I heard George say.  
  
"'Twasn't me, George!" Fred protested. I felt my body being moved to the bed.  
  
"It was me." Hermione said from the corner of the room. I heard footsteps them felt her kiss my forehead. "I'm sorry Ron. I had too!"  
  
I heard them move away from me, but if I strained to listen I could hear them very well.  
  
"Do you reckon he's mad?" Fred was asking.  
  
"Let's face it. Anyone who hears voice's isn't all there!" George sighed.  
  
"He did mention killing someone, though. You think he meant Percy?" Hermione asked.  
  
"No. Ron couldn't kill Percy. Ron couldn't kill anyone. Especially not a friend or a family member. He's got to be off his rocker. That's all." George sighed.  
  
"But then where is Percy?" Fred asked. "We haven't found him."  
  
"Maybe he was kidnapped." George shrugged.  
  
"Should we tell Dumbledore?" Hermione asked. I could almost see her wringing her hands.  
  
[Oh, no! We've broken the rules!] I mimicked her. [Whatever shall we do?!]  
  
"I suppose we'd better. He might be able to help." Fred sighed.  
  
"But what if he can't? What if Ron is crazy?" George asked. "Let's face it! He hasn't been acting normal. We found him in a closet. He was begging someone in his sleep for help or to stop doing something. He talks about killing someone, calls for Percy and then asks us to stop someone talking to him. He's off his rocker!"  
  
[I'm not crazy!] I tried to argue.  
  
-Yes you are! - Percy told me.  
  
[Please, Percy!] I begged.  
  
-Alright! But like I said before. I'm coming back. You take me down; I take you down. -  
  
"That's for that ray of sunshine George." Fred sighed.  
  
"We won't know what happened until we ask Ron. Ron's the only one who knows what happened and he can't tell us. We need help, if nothing else." Hermione reasoned.  
  
"Help? We need a miracle!" George snorted.  
  
"Look, if you can't be optimistic, leave the room!" Hermione ordered. There was silence for a couple seconds then she resumed talking.  
  
"We need help. Fred you send an owl to your mum and tell her the Ron is sick, but we're taking care of it. She shouldn't worry more than necessary." Hermione sighed.  
  
"I'm on it." Fred agreed. A couple of seconds of silence was followed by a door opening and closing.  
  
"George, you go and find Dumbledore. Tell him what happened. Please keep all comments and personal commentary to yourself. Just the facts. When he know, find Madam Pomfrey and see if we can get another sleeping potion for Ron." Hermione commanded.  
  
"Fine." George sighed, and left the room.  
  
[No! Please don't make me go to sleep!] I tried to beg Hermione. [Don't leave me alone with myself!]  
  
I heard some floorboards creaking and then a muttered spell.  
  
"Please, don't!" I thought, before realizing that I could speak again. I tried to move my arms but found that everywhere from my neck down was still petrified.  
  
"Don't what Ron?" Hermione asked me.  
  
"Don't leave me alone." I said after a few minutes.  
  
[They already think I'm mad, I'd better not do anything else to support that conclusion.]  
  
-Ha! But you are mad! - Percy snickered. -Oh! This is so much fun! -  
  
"Leave me alone, Percy." I snarled through gritted teeth.  
  
"Percy?" Hermione asked, turning around.  
  
-Oh, I don't think so. This is too much fun! - Percy snickered again. -Perfect revenge. You kill me; I convince everyone that you're mad! -  
  
"This isn't like you, Percy!" I spat.  
  
-No, I suppose it's not. But I can be quiet ambitious when I want to be, can't I? You said that yourself. -  
  
"Go away, Percy!" I growled.  
  
"Ron? Percy isn't here." Hermione said.  
  
"Yes he is." I told her. "He won't leave me alone."  
  
-Actually, Ron, I don't think I will leave. I'm just going to sit right here and watch. -  
  
"Ron. What happened during your shift tonight?" Hermione asked me.  
  
-Oh, yes Ron! What did happen? - Percy asked me, smiling to himself.  
  
"I can't tell you." I sighed, ignoring Percy.  
  
"Who did you kill?" Hermione asked.  
  
-Tell her! - Percy ordered me.  
  
"Percy." I whispered very softly, closing my eyes. I looked up at Hermione and repeated myself a little louder. "I killed Percy!"  
  
"What?" Hermione asked. "But..why?"  
  
"I didn't mean to!" I said, turning my face so I wouldn't look at her. "He told me to run. To hide. I ran away, Hermione! Some Gryffindor I turned out to be."  
  
-Good, Boy! - Percy smiled. -Tell them the truth! Tell her what a cowardly murder you are! -  
  
"I know...I know." I sobbed.  
  
"Ron, I haven't said anything." Hermione said confused.  
  
"I wasn't talking to you!" I sighed. "He's in my head."  
  
"Who's in your head?"  
  
"Percy is." I sighed, risking a look in her direction. She didn't look condemning, just worried. "He's up there, telling me what to do."  
  
"Don't worry, Ron. When Dumbledore gets here..." Hermione started.  
  
"I'm already here." Dumbledore said from the doorway. "I've been listening in since you asked Ron what happened during his shift. You must be very tired, Ms. Granger. Why don't you get some sleep? I'll sit up with Mr. Weasley. Oh, and would you mind removing your ingenious spell?"  
  
"Yes, sir." Hermione mumbled, removing the spell. She kissed me on the check and left the room. 


	5. Help and Percy

(AN: Wasn't the last chapter fun? I dunno, I bet I'm the first person to write about a character going insane. Try it! It's fun! But just so you know, the next chapters are going to get VERY confusing! When I do a POV thing, start to keep in mind that even if I've said they were one person that might not be who they really are. Make any sense? Never mind.) Oh and as a refresher:  
  
!!!..!!! - Ron's POV [..] - Ron's thoughts  
  
@@@..@@@ - Percy's POV {..} - Percy's thoughts  
  
###..### - Hermione's POV '..' - Hermione's thoughts  
  
Disclaimer: Own nothing.but I wish I owned Ron ^_~  
  
Ron: Err....*backs away*  
  
Chapter 5  
  
!!!I stretched and lifted myself into a sitting position as Dumbledore walked slowly across the room. He pulled up a chair and sat down without saying a word. I sat there, not saying anything either, trying to ignore the awkward silence.  
  
"Sir.."I ventured after a few minutes.  
  
"It's alright, Weasley." Dumbledore sighed. "I know what you're going to say. It wasn't your fault. He told you to run and hide. You couldn't have known that he would be killed."  
  
"But sir! I'm in Gryffindor! I'm supposed to be brave."  
  
"I know. It's all right though. Gryffindors are allowed to be afraid now and then. Just like Hufflepuffs can feel lazy and Ravenclaws can make unwise decisions. Do you know the real definition of courage? It's doing something even though you're afraid."  
  
"But I didn't do anything!" I sighed.  
  
"Yes you did!" Dumbledore smiled. "You ran away. Haven't you every heard that saying no is sometimes the bravest thing? Well, you ran away. You listened to Percy and you obeyed orders."  
  
"I should have been there for him!" I said, fighting tears.  
  
"Ron, let me give you this situation. You're walking down the hall with your sister and you see three of your worst enemies. They mean to hurt you but they don't know your there yet. Would you want to confront them with your sister, or alone?"  
  
"Definitely alone." I shrugged. Then it hit me. "Oh! Percy was protecting me. Then why is he in my head?"  
  
"You want to know why? Because you put him there. Notice how he hasn't talked to you during our discussion? You created him from your guilt. Percy's death was not your fault, Ron."  
  
"Are you sure?" I asked. "He's not really in my head?"  
  
"I'm positive." Dumbledore smiled. "I may be thought of as crazy and 'off my rocker', but I never tell people things that I am not sure of."  
  
"Thank you, Sir." I said, smiling.  
  
"Your welcome. In case you want to know, two of your brother, your sister and Ms. Granger are waiting outside. Would you like to see them?"  
  
"Yes, please." I smiled. "But how did you know? You told Hermione to go to bed."  
  
"Things rarely happen in my school with my knowledge. It's a talent you develop when you get older."  
  
"Oh. I see, sir." I said, nodding.  
  
"Oh, and Mr. Weasley?" Dumbledore asked, before leaving the room.  
  
"Yes, sir?" I asked. He turned and tossed me a book.  
  
"You might find this interesting." Dumbledore winked and closed the door behind him.!!!  
  
@@@I sighed and brushed my black hair out of my face.  
  
{How could Snape stand this hair?!} I wondered. I looked out the window and was suddenly faced by a white owl. I let it in and accepted the letter. It stood around, waiting for a reply, so I turned away. I opened the letter and was relieved to find that it was from Dumbledore. I skimmed the content and scribbled a note for the owl to carry back. It took the note and flew off. I ran to the next room and glanced in the mirror then at one of the clocks.  
  
{Thirty more minutes.} I sighed. I ran to my bedroom grabbed a bag from under my bed. I threw in my extra robe and my few personal things. When this was done I looked at the clock again.  
  
{Just enough time for some tea.} I decided taking out a cup and my wand. @@@  
  
###I sighed and waved to George as he stepped into the Gryffindor common room. I turned back to the portrait and pushed it open.  
  
"Bit late, isn't it dear?" The fat lady mumbled.  
  
"I need to visit Ron." I sighed.  
  
"The spunky red head? Yes, I have noticed that he hasn't been around lately. Thank goodness he hasn't been leaving me open lately."  
  
"Why can't you forgive him for that one time in our fourth year?" I sighed.  
  
"Sorry, dear. Us pictures are almost immortal. That means we bare huge grudges."  
  
"Honestly!" I sighed, throwing my hands in the air. I turned and began the long walk to the infirmary.  
  
'Pictures can be very obnoxious.' I sighed to myself. 'Funny. Seven years ago, this all would have seemed so odd. Now I act like I grew up with this stuff.'  
  
I slipped into the infirmary and snuck into Ron's room. He was lying on his bed with his eyes closed and his hands behind his head.  
  
"Hello, Hermione." Ron smiled, not opening his eyes.  
  
"Ronald Weasley!" I scolded. "Why on earth are you still awake?"  
  
"I suppose I should ask you the same thing." Ron smiled, sitting up.  
  
"Never mind that." I sighed. I looked around and noticed a book on a bedside table. "Are you reading? Oh, Ron I'm so proud!"  
  
"This?" Ron asked, pointing to the book. "No. Just something Dumbledore gave me. I haven't even looked at it really. Too busy."  
  
"Only you and Harry can be sick in the infirmary and still be busy." I grinned. Ron smiled. "That's all right, though."  
  
"Of course it is!" Ron laughed. "Proves I'm tough."  
  
"Humph!" I giggled. "Did I ever tell you how appealing the macho attitude is..not?"  
  
"It isn't?" Ron asked, crest fallen.  
  
"Not a bit." I laughed, grabbing the book. "Muggle Magic?"  
  
"That's the book Percy was reading!" Ron exclaimed. I looked at him oddly, but he took the book from me and flipped it open. "This book belongs to Professor Severus Snape."  
  
"What was Percy doing with Snape's book?" I wondered.  
  
"I'm not the smart one!" Ron muttered, passing me the book. I sat down on his bed and flipped to the next page...which was blank. So were the next pages, and the next! I flipped to the fourth page when I suddenly realized how stupid I was being. I pulled my wand out and pointed it at the parchment.  
  
"Show your secrets!" I ordered. Nothing happened. "I command you! Revel your writing!"  
  
Still nothing.  
  
"Damn it! I wish Dumbledore was here; he'd know what to do!" I muttered, about to throw the book across the room. Suddenly Ron grabbed my wrist.  
  
"You did it!" He exclaimed. I looked down at the book and saw, to my astonishment, words were appearing.  
  
"Writing or reading?" Ron read, before shooting me a glance.  
  
"Interesting." I murmured. "Reading."  
  
The words instantly disappeared and were replaced by a list of names. Followed by numbers and then a calendar.  
  
"What?" Ron asked, completely baffled. "We found Snape's personal planner?"  
  
"Oh, Ron!" I sighed. "Don't be so stupid!"  
  
"We'll if your so brilliant, what is it then?"  
  
"It's a spy report!" I explained.  
  
"Why would Percy have that? And Snape's spy report at that!" Ron asked.  
  
"Because Percy wasn't really your brother." A voice said from the doorway. I jumped up and quickly sat in the chair next to Ron's bed. I was Dumbledore. He nodded to me, looking completely un-surprised that I was there at this hour.  
  
"What do you mean?" Ron asked. "Of course Percy was my brother."  
  
"Oh, I'm not saying he wasn't!" Dumbledore shrugged. "But, I am saying that the man you went on patrol with was not your brother Percy."  
  
"Of course he was Percy!" Ron laughed. "I saw him! Same red hair, same robes! It was him."  
  
"Then perhaps you should allow me introduce you to my guest." Dumbledore sighed, pulling out what looked like an old-fashioned pocket watch. "He's actually just down the hall."  
  
"Headmaster?" A voice called.  
  
"In here." Dumbledore responded. Ron sat up straighter and even I tried to position myself to see the doorway better.  
  
"Honestly, Headmaster! Why did you ask me to meet you here?" The voice asked, turning the corner so that we could all see him.  
  
"PERCY!" Ron gasped. ### 


	6. Flashbacks and the Truth

(AN: Okay, in case you had trouble understanding the last chapter, it all gets explained in this chapter. Don't worry. Even I don't follow what I wrote!)  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing.  
  
Chapter 6  
  
@@@"RON?!" I exclaimed as I took a step backwards. I knew that Dumbledore always had a reason for everything he did, but I had not expected this! I suddenly realized that Ron was the one in the infirmary bed. I grew angry and turned to face Dumbledore.  
  
"You didn't tell me!" I shouted, feeling my face grow red. "When were you planing to tell me that my brother was sick? Are you now planing to tell me that Fred and George have been captured? Ginny's been expelled? Charlie was incinerated when a dragon breathed on him?!"  
  
"Percy!" Dumbledore sighed, holding up a hand to calm me. "Ron is perfectly alright! Ask him yourself."  
  
"Well?" I asked him. I meant for it to come out as a question but it sounded harsh and biting, even to my ears.  
  
"I'm fine." Ron confirmed. I noticed that he seemed to be bracing himself for one of my speeches. Ready to brave the storm like a true Gryffindor. "And so are the others."  
  
"Then what are you doing in the infirmary?" I asked, narrowing my eyes.  
  
"I had a sort of...what's it called, Hermione?" Ron sighed. I looked to his right and noticed, for the first time since I stepped through the door, Hermione.  
  
"A nervous breakdown. It might also be called temporary insanity." Hermione supplied.  
  
"Sorry, Hermione." I apologized, nodding to her. "I didn't see you there."  
  
Hermione nodded back and smiled tightly.  
  
"Wait a second! Why did you have a breakdown?!" I asked. I was now thoroughly confused.  
  
"I though..." Ron began. "HEY! What's going on here! You're dead!"  
  
"I am not!" I started. I soon got over the shock of being thought of as dead, and grew indignant. "I am most certainly alive!"  
  
"But I heard you die! Damn it! I had a breakdown because of you!" Ron screamed at me.  
  
"Would you please explain what is going on?!" I asked Dumbledore angrily. I grew even more irritated when I noticed that Dumbledore was fighting a small smile.  
  
"Yes," Ron sighed. "Please do."  
  
"A few weeks ago, Professor Snape, one of our most useful spies, was reviled as a spy. He barely managed to escape with his life and came to me. Percy, who was with me at the time, volunteered to trade places with him so that Professor Snape could be even safer. They have been under the influence of Polyjuice since then; Percy hiding in a place I had designated and Professor Snape with you." Dumbledore said, facing Ron. He then turned to face me. "Last night, Ron and Severus were on watch together when Snape went after a sound down the hall. He was tortured and put under the imperius curse. He was then directed to kill everyone in the castle. Fortunately, he managed to fight it off and told Ron to run away. He fought hard but Ron heard him die."  
  
"How?" I asked, my voice quivering.  
  
"The death curse." Dumbledore said slowly. I felt the color drain out of my face.  
  
"He was brave to 'til the end. He protected Ron and the other students. He always did feel that the students were to be protected with everything no matter what. He would be happy to know that he saved them all." Dumbledore sighed. I nodded.  
  
{At least Ron is safe.} I told myself, trying to look on the bright side. @@@  
  
~~~Flashback~~~  
  
Percy sat in a chair bundled up in blankets and wishing his robes would dry faster.  
  
"I must say Percy." Dumbledore sighed. "I am terrible sorry that I had to call you out on such a night as this."  
  
"No, It's alright. It was silly of me to run out of my room without my wand; I forgot I needed to cross the courtyard to reach your office. What did you want to ask me about anyway?" Percy asked, shivering. Dumbledore stood and felt Percy's robes.  
  
"There. All dry." Dumbledore smiled as lightning light up the sky. "There's a screen over there that you can change behind."  
  
Percy nodded his thanks and hurried off to change. He came back a few minutes later, fully clothed and lugging the wet blankets. Dumbledore magiced them into a chest and they resumed their seats around the fire.  
  
"Percy, have you noticed anything odd about your position at the ministry?" Dumbledore asked.  
  
"Odd, sir?" Percy asked, accepting the cup of steaming tea Dumbledore had conjured up. "How do you mean?"  
  
"Odd as in abnormal, peculiar or wrong."  
  
"Have I seen any dark activities, is that what your asking me?" Percy asked.  
  
"If you want to phrase it that way." Dumbledore shrugged, sipping his tea innocently.  
  
"Well, to be perfectly honest, sir, this is only my fourth year with the ministry, and I can't even call this a year. Now that I've decided to stay here and help protect the children, I guess you could say I've quit; though there is the understanding that I will be taken back by the ministry when you-know...sorry, Voldemort has been vanquished again. Why do you ask, sir?" Percy said, finishing off his tea, which Dumbledore offered to refill. Percy nodded to show he accepted when Dumbledore's office door was suddenly thrown open with a bang. Percy jumped to his feet, spilling his tea everywhere but Dumbledore merely turned calmly to view the intruder.  
  
It was Snape. Snape stumbled in and collapsed on the floor groaning in pain. Dumbledore and Percy rushed over and rolled Snape on his back. He was tired, bleeding and soaking wet, but alive. Percy stood and was about to run to get Madam Pomfrey, when Snape spoke.  
  
"They found me out, Albus. I was betrayed."  
  
"Who?" Dumbledore asked.  
  
"One of our own. He turned on to try and save his own skins. Perhaps there is justice, though." Snape said as he laughed slightly. This seemed to cause him pain as he winced and grabbed his stomach. "They still killed him."  
  
"Can you stand?" Percy asked. Snape seemed to think this over before nodded. Dumbledore and Percy helped him to a couch where he was able to lay in more comfort. Dumbledore called to Madam Pomfrey through the fire and then returned bearing tea and blankets. Snape allowed them to cover him in blankets but would not allow them to look at his wounds.  
  
"What happened?" Dumbledore asked, after Snape was settled.  
  
"When they were told that I was a spy, they executed the informant and went after me. The area around our meeting place was spelled with an anti-spell charm, so I couldn't disparate. I ducked or blocked most of the hexes, but a few hit me. Finally could disparate and made it to Hogsmead. They didn't follow me. I guess they figured that it's to near Hogwarts and too many good wizards were out tonight. Ran the rest of the way here."  
  
"You're going to be fine, Severus." Dumbledore assured Snape as Madam Pomfrey came in. Percy and Dumbledore drew back and Percy frowned a bit.  
  
"Sir?" Percy asked.  
  
"Yes?" Dumbledore replied.  
  
"Snape is going to be a very important witness for light magic, isn't he?"  
  
"Yes, Percy. I imagine he will." Dumbledore nodded.  
  
"So, if he were to die, we'd lose a lot of evidence."  
  
"This is true." Dumbledore smiled.  
  
"So he'll be hunted by death eaters, right?"  
  
"That is the most likely scenario, yes."  
  
"So, what if I trade places with him?" Percy asked. "I'll go into hiding and Snape will take my place here. No one would think to kill me, and if I am killed while they think I'm Snape, then they'll be off his trail."  
  
"That is a most ingenious plan." Dumbledore smiled. "Would you be willing to take on the danger?"  
  
"I'm a Gryffindor!" Percy laughed. "I'm brave, remember?"  
  
~~~End Flashback~~~ 


	7. Visits and a Funeral

(AN: Does it make any sense now? I hope it does. I really tried!)  
  
Disclaimer: Own nothing  
  
Chapter 7  
  
!!!I rolled over on my side and tried to ignore the sunlight that was shining on my face. After five minutes of this, I decide that by the time I got back to sleep it'd be time to get up anyway and that it wasn't worth my trouble. I sat up and stretched before setting about find out the time. I'd fallen asleep soon after Percy had left with Dumbledore and Hermione had gone back to her room but I was still tired.  
  
[Hermione reckoned that even if I could sleep as long as I wanted, I'd always be tried. I think she might be right!] I think. I laugh at the thought of this.  
  
[I'd probably end up like Rip Van Winkle.] I smile, thinking about the muggle fairy tale I'd read once. [Hermione made me read it, so I put up a huge fight, but it was actually vastly entertaining. Interesting that muggles could have such a fascination with them. I find them quite ugly.]  
  
I stretched again and pushed my bed covers off. I reached over and grabbed the shirt that Hermione had brought me, while pulling my nightshirt off. I changed into the outfit Hermione had brought and lay back down, not trusting my legs to support me. I may have been out of the fighting but I was still unsure about walking. I just wanted to be on the safe side; a few days rest never hurt anyone. I looked out the window and sighed.  
  
[I really wish someone were here to talk with me.] I sighed. [I might have been busy yesterday, but I'm really bored today.]  
  
I perked up though when, as if an answer to my prayers (another muggle expression), I heard a voice down the hall. The owner of the voice was at the front desk. I rolled my eyes.  
  
[Who would have to ask the front desk what room I'm in? It must be a visitor for someone else.] I sighed. Suddenly the door flew open and Harry was standing there.  
  
"RON!" Harry cried. "Are you alright?"  
  
"Harry?" I asked. "How did you know I was here? Did Fred or George owl you?"  
  
"No. I came here to report to Dumbledore and he said this is where you were. You are okay, aren't you?"  
  
"Yes. Fine." I reassured him. "I just had a bit of a breakdown."  
  
"Yes, I heard. Someone said you went crazy." Harry sighed, sitting in the chair next to my bed. "Is this true?"  
  
"A little." I admitted. "I thought I had killed someone for a while and I kept hearing their voice."  
  
"Did you kill them?"  
  
"No. It wasn't my fault." I sighed, hanging me head. Harry could see that I was still kicking myself for not helping but didn't press it.  
  
"Oh. OH! Is this about the Snape thing?"  
  
"You heard about that?" I asked.  
  
"Well, not out right, no. But I overheard Dumbledore talking to Percy and," Harry blushed.  
  
"Listening in on conversations." I smiled. "The twins would be proud."  
  
"Oh yes. I saw them. They were listening in with me." Harry laughed. I couldn't help it! I had to laugh as well.  
  
"So, you're fine?" Harry asked.  
  
"YES!" I exclaimed. "Well, as well as I can be. I still can't believe that Snape is dead. It's like with Draco."  
  
"Yea. I heard about him too. God!" Harry sighed, slumping down in his seat.  
  
"Well, at least you're taking Snape's death better than Percy." I shrugged.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"When Percy found out that Snape was dead, he went nuclear!" I exclaimed, throwing my hands in the air to mimic an explosion. [I LOVE muggle expressions.]  
  
"Oh?" Harry asked, clearly surprised. "I didn't think that he and Snape were that close."  
  
"They weren't." I said. "Sure, Percy respected Snape a lot, but they weren't close at all. Kind of like the relationship between a Gryffindor first year from a wizard family and Dumbledore. Anyway, Percy went completely berserk! Something along the lines of 'I switch places with him so that his information will be safe and we can put away dark wizards and he still manages to get killed?!'. I sort of feel for him, you know?"  
  
"Sure." Harry nodded. "We lost a lot with Snape. I mean his personality and general niceness might have been crap but he was still a person."  
  
"I know. At least we still have his spy report; that will help us." I sighed. Harry sighed as well and moved to stand. We shook hands and Harry went to the door. I waited for him to leave, but he just stood there.  
  
"Ron?" He asked after a few minutes.  
  
"Yes, Harry?" I asked. [What now?]  
  
"Are you really okay about this Snape thing? I can tell you still hate yourself for leaving him to die."  
  
"Well, it was worse when I thought Percy had died. But yea, I still can't believe myself."  
  
"Ron, you've got to understand. The death eater who killed Snape with one of the unforgivable curses wouldn't have hesitated to kill you. Snape was protecting you. I think he even knew that he was going to die."  
  
"Yea." I nodded, looking out the window again. "I know that no one hates me for what I did, but it still with me. Harry, everyday I'm going to wake up and know that I heard someone die. There is nothing I can do about it; it's the past, and things like that shouldn't be tampered with, but it's going to haunt me. It's going to be that tiny nagging in the back of my mind. It's a real strong nagging now, but I suppose, hope, that in a few months, years, the nagging will die down to perhaps a tug or a twinge. But don't worry, everyone's got his or her own ghosts. You've got yours; I've got mine."  
  
"All right Ron. I understand." I heard him nod. A few seconds later, the door opened and then closed, leaving me to battle my ghosts alone. But that's how I want it. !!!  
  
@@@I shivered against the wind and pulled my black robes tighter.  
  
{I hate funerals.} I told myself for the hundredth time. I looked around and felt rather bad for Snape. A sparse twenty were the only true friends he had. I sighed. But then again, perhaps he knew that those others weren't his friends. Perhaps he didn't care. I smiled for a second, before quickly fighting it back.  
  
{Bet he didn't think the Weasley's would be coming to his funeral though.}  
  
It was true! Bill and Charlie, though unable to make it, had sent flowers for the gravesite. Mum and Dad had come over last night to be here this morning and the twins, Ron and Ginny had been excused from morning classes to come. I looked around the crowd and was surprised to see Remus Lupin and Sirius Black in the very back. Actually, a lot of people I had never expected to show, had come. Evidently because Snape had sacrificed of his own life to protect the children, he was considered a hero by many. The official funeral had been over for a while, but people were still wandering around, or sitting quietly and thinking.  
  
I was one of the thinkers. Snape hadn't just saved my brothers and sister's lives, but mine as well. I had been trying to protect him, but instead I had put him in extreme danger. I looked at the stone on the edge of the forbidden forest. Dumbledore had conjured it up and engraved Snape's name as well as Cedric Diggory. It would be a memorial to anyone who while serving the school, either as a teacher or student, had died. I looked away, unable to think about it anymore.  
  
Though we hadn't found Snape's body, Dumbledore insisted that we give him a funeral anyway. I hadn't wanted to go. I just wanted to sit in my room and cry. It wasn't like Snape and I were best friends, but when a man gives up his life to save your family, you owe him something. I didn't know what to give him really. He had no family. I sighed and looked down at my hands again. Suddenly a warm weight came down on my shoulder. I turned to see Ron.  
  
"You thinking about Snape?" Ron asked me.  
  
"Yea." I nodded.  
  
"It's a pity when someone is only well-liked and respected in death."  
  
"I owe him a lot, you know." I told Ron. Ron nodded and we sat silently together for a while. Soon all the others had drifted away and it was just Ron and I. Ron sighed and stood.  
  
"I've got to get back to class." Ron sighed. I nodded and stood as well. We turned and began our walk to the castle, enjoying the peace as long as we could.  
  
(AN: AWWWW! The end) 


End file.
